Some of you might have already heard of what I am about to tell you if you're following me on social media. I'VE GOT ENGAGED!
Yeaaaah, I am really excited and so is my man - or should I say fiance now. Sunday night found him kneeling in front of me while we were both crying rivers of joy (seriously, when one of us starts crying, the other involuntarily has to join in). After I whispered a delighted "Yes", we hugged for a long time, almost unable to fully grasp our happiness.
The past weeks have been really fantastic as, apart from our recent engagement, I have started a job as a full-time freelance, writer which means I will actually be making money with writing every day. September 2018, it seems, is my month to start a new and better life and I couldn't be more grateful. Ever since a long time, I feel everything is just as it should be. Me and Jake have never been happier and I have established a career which allows me to work from anywhere with WiFi and my computer - which is a dream come true considering how much I appreciate geographical flexibility.
On this sunny and warm early autumn day, however, there is a twist of sadness in my guts, too, as it marks the first death anniversary of my beloved Lilly. Who doesn't know her, she was our beautiful and gentle dog who had to be put to eternal sleep last year because of a tumour. Thankfully, she was already pretty old, but her loss still rips my heart apart now and then.
Moments in which fleeting memories of past events - whether good or bad - pass are usually an ideal moment to halt and reflect on what has happened in between, and leading up to the present. When I compare my life of a year prior and now, it could hardly be any more different and I feel rather like a caterpillar having finally plopped out of its cocoon, being able to slowly spread newly acquired wings to set off - as corny as that sounds.
A year ago, Mr Z (as I shall henceforth also call him) and I had just quit our boring office jobs, put our money on a VW bus and were preparing to take a road trip through Europe. We didn't even have a flat to call ours and bunked in with my little sister in her and her boyfriend's flat (and I am eternally grateful to both of them!). Our entire furniture was stowed away in my parents' cellar, while we were sleeping only on our mattresses on the floor. Our further path was unclear and we felt forlorn, uncertain and slightly frustrated with our lives. I had just had the worst year of my life coming to a close with the possibility of my mum having lung cancer, me slaving away in a horrid office job, unemployment and my dog's death - truly not the best of years.
Tonight finds me writing this post in my lovely bed (where the mattress is not on the floor) in my cosy flat in Vienna, my fiance next to me. I find myself grinning stupidly whenever my glance catches my diamond engagement ring, and I will get up in the morning and write content for clients who actually pay me money for my work while planning a wedding in between. Life's good!
The ironic things is - and I am coming to a close with this, don't worry - that for coming to the point at which I am now, everything from last year was apparently necessary. I've grown incredibly strong in the course of it and my limits were severely tested, but I realised how much strength and endurance sleeps within me, and that gives me great comfort and courage to test unknown waters.
Never before have I felt so confident in myself and my abilities and it seems to transgress to others. It has only taken a month to get me where I am now, after trying hard for over a year. Suddenly everything seems to fall into line effortlessly when so much frustration plastered the path in the past. My present progress seems to give proof to the words that good things come with time. And now I have decided to enjoy all the times of happiness to the fullest and cherish every wonderful memory on the way - for cloudy days are always to come and help us grow at some point.
Writer. Editor. Blogger. YouTuber. Freelancer. Traveller. English fanatic.