I haven't written anything in the past days because I have been grieving. On Tuesday, 19th September 2017, my darling dog Lilly had to be put to sleep, aged 14. I got her when she was just nine weeks and she was my angel and companion until she had to go. Unfortunately, she had a tumor and she suffered so much, we decided it was better to let her go and relieve her from her pain.
People who do not have dogs might not understand how painful it is to lose your furry companion but it really is and having been accompanied by Lilly for 14 years rips a huge hole into everybody's life who knew her well.
The past days I escaped to Italy with my man to alleviate the pain a little and keep my thoughts from thinking too much, but more on that later. Now, I want to concentrate on the beautiful creature who has left our family and I want to share her beauty and character with a letter to her.
My darling Lilly,
I dearly hope you are somewhere nice now and are playing with Timmy as you used to. You came to us so little you couldn't jump on the sofas and we had to lift you up. You were so tiny you fit into my lap and that was where you often slept. You slept in Mum's bed because you were so afraid of the darkness.
We got you in autumn and I took you on walks every day and you chased the leaves in the wind with your baby walk and your puppy bark. Often you were so tired mid-way that I had to carry you and you rested your head on my shoulder and marvelled at the world from there.
You were a happy dog and you absolutely loved us, as we loved you. Your loyalty reached beyond the universe and you were the best consoler there was.
When I had a shower and put on my bathrobe, you always chased the band which held it in its place and we had a little pull and drag battle, you on the one, I on the other side. You were yapping so happily when we came home that even if I had had the worst of all days, I had to smile and feel cheered up.
Admittedly, you couldn't properly wag your tail, it was our running joke. You always sat on it and if you wagged, it was a teeny, weeny movement and it was a real shocker if you wagged vigorously for once.
You could open ANY door. We couldn't teach you tricks and I, for my part, think it's not because you were too daft, it was because you didn't see the point of it. Still, you didn't lack your smarts. As said, no door was safe from you and you could play tricks on Timmy. I remember that when you both got bones, you would bark, pretending there was someone coming. Then you waited until Timmy raced to the door and you stole his bone.
You always crawled underneath the duvets, which was like having the best hot water bottle anyone could dream of. You would stand in front of the bed, looking expectantly, and when we raised the duvet for you, you would jump underneath and lie close to the leg, huffing and puffing like a train.
You loved bottles and you gnawed on our furniture. All our table corners were bitten down and if ever you could get a bottle, you would lie down and gnaw on it until the lid came off, lick twice into the bottle and walk away, now disinterested. You also stole butter and we knew when you had been there because there were two discernible traces of dog teeth in the butter and a guilty-as-hell look on your face.
You always tried to make it right for everybody. Once, at the kitchen table, I ordered you to jump on the table (which I shouldn't have) and Mum ordered you to come to her instead because she didn't want dogs on the table. You looked at both of us, then ran to Mum and jumped on the table from there. We laughed so much.
You generally always made us laugh and there are so many happy memories coined to your presence I would be writing until eternity if listing them here. Also, many will remember the Mohican you had on the back of your neck and which was your trademark, so to speak. Your lip is legendary, too, always coming up when you were growling and playing and you made us so happy when you did.
So, my darling Lilly, as bereft as we feel, we know you are in a better place now and you must know you will be dearly missed and never be forgotten. Tender smiles will fill our faces whenever we speak of you and I, for my part, know I will never have a dog like you again because you were my first and the first is always something special and unforgettable. Don't forget you will be the one who paved the way for many other dogs to come and to make us happy and through you we have learnt to be better owners, a better family and better people altogether. You were our angel and Dad even called you an Animagus because you were so human at some times, we could have mistaken you for one. You died old, which is a relieve and your life was full of joy and happiness and we did our best to make it the best for you! We love you so much and there will always be a little Lilly-shaped hole in our hearts until we are reunited one day.
I love you beyond the universe my darling and rest in peace.
Your caretaker, owner and best friend among many,
Writer. Editor. Blogger. YouTuber. Freelancer. Traveller. English fanatic.